Thursday, June 26, 2008

Before saying "I DO"

There are two big important questions that every girl need to as themselves at least once in their lifetime. If the questions are not asked to oneself, the oneself will be jumping into the deep sea of unknown. For the lucky ones, there might be no regrets at all because the life is as imagined or seen through rose tinted glasses. For the rest of us (yes, me included), might not be so lucky and get the most shocking experience for the first time in their life!

What in the world am I babbling about you asking? Well, I am talking about life after marriage! As most of you know, my recent relocation to KL was because babe and I will finally tie knots after dating for more than eight years. I know most friends (and some relatives) are breathing sigh of relief that we are finally doing it. I am looking forward to it as well because life as husband and wife will definitely be different than just being a couple. For one thing, we will be legally bound to each other in the eye of law. So, the next time someone asks who is this man/woman next of kin, then, our parents/ siblings will not be the first to stand up and say they are.

Instead, it will be the person that we choose to live the days of our lives with. This might sound very romantic but the fact is, things will be totally different and might not be as rosy as we saw in films, i.e. happily ever after on a daily basis. So, things will be different and there will be things that we only discover when we start to live together but no matter what there is obviously a reason for the church ceremony to add in the part about ‘for better or for worse’!

So, what are the questions that you (or I) should ask before saying “I DO”. Oh yah, the main reason I thought of this was because RK and I was talking about things to consider before deciding how many kids to have! I thought I better not jump the gun (and frighten babe and myself in the process when he read this posting! WINK! ) and take a few steps back to marriage instead. I think at this point of time, it would be too late for me to chicken out of the matrimony but I can at least prepare myself mentally and psychologically right?

So, I guess the first thing to consider is sharing the bed with someone for the rest of my life (Don’t get dirty ideas or thoughts ok, especially SK!!) I am talking about the space available on the bed lar! I don’t know about you but sleeping on a nice big bed all alone is really one of life most enjoyable thing! When I was in Kch, my bed is a single bed but I used to love to drag the queen size mattress to the living room and fall asleep on it while watching tv. I also love having lots and lots of pillows, bolters, stuffed animals and at least one blanket on the bed with me, even on the single bed! Obviously, when sharing a bed, even a queen or king size one, cannot have all those lor.

Secondly, household chores! As I start to live independent life here far away from my parents, I only just realized how much household chores there are daily! There is the floor to sweep & clean every other day. Laundry to put into the washing machine, hang up to dry and then folded. There is cleaning after each meals, buying groceries and so on! Sometimes, there seem to be hardly any time to sit down and rest especially on a work day. This of course means that you will be too tired to go anyway, and hence the freedom & social life also affected!

What else arh? Oh Money! Of course when just married will have a lot of spending especially if moving house and so on. But actually, I think I managed my finances better because I plan for the future. Cannot go back to mom and dad (as often!). So, must make sure plan all the things properly and put certain amount aside for savings lor. In fact, babe and I just agreed to save at least RM100 each per month. Might not seem like a lot but if one year, will have RM2,400! So, this is a good thing that I can think of lar.

And of course, have someone to share everything with (not only bed lar). I mean share our worries, joy, happiness or simply chit chat and be ourselves. I ever asked babe before who am I to him. He said best friend. At first I felt insulted because I want him to say love of his life (HAHA!) and then he explain, best friend because I am someone that he can share all his thoughts and worry comfortably with! Best friend because he knows that he say do whatever and I will not judge him. Best friend because he knows that I will support him no matter what he decide. Touched or not? No wonder I will say “I DO” to this man.

6 comments:

Colin Kueh said...

hmmm...
no need ring and flower before say i do?

Jen's Place said...

Hi Colin!!
Ring and flowers is for the movies lar! This is real life wor...

Nick Phillips said...

Hey Jen, you're right about the reality of marriage. It isn't always a bed of roses but as long as you've found the right person then no matter what happens in real life, you'll always have someone to go through it with. That's the best thing about marriage, having someone to share your ups and downs with :D

Jen's Place said...

Hi Nick,
Bed of roses....whoever said marriage is a bed of roses must be either insane or never been married! :P
But I wont trade my babe for anyone else!

rebeena said...

Ngaiti...Funnie when i read the words "BED", hahaha...

RM2400, gud hav this plan. For raining days or future BB ma.,..

Ur HB say u are his BEST FREND...
Congratulations!! U finnaly say "I DO, I DO, I DO DO!!

^(^@^)^

Jen's Place said...

Hi Rebeena,

So cute ah the piggie face! Plus u ah, so so so so dirty minded ah~! BED IS FOR SLEEPING! What u think BED for ah?? hahahaha

Yar, for starter RM2,400 per yr is a good plan. Still checking out wat is the good date to sign ler...